LEISURE is a Manly fan. He is precisely the reason why Manly are nobody's second team and why they will not have Sydney's support on Sunday. In short, he is the reason we hate Manly.

Because Leisure is an opinionated loudmouth who hasn't shut his trap all season about his bloody footy team. This week, it's been intolerable. Unfortunately for those of us on the Herald's sportsdesk, we have to work with him.

We weren't going to make this personal. And, sure, there might be some HR issues involved in sledging a workmate. And, OK, maybe we should have had the legal department sign off on it.

But we're prepared to sail close to the wind, much like those chino-trousered, sailor-hatted, loafer-wearing, Moet-sipping yachties on the harbour on Sunday arvo who think they have right of way over the ferry.

Alas, Leisure can't say he's one of those. No, he's born and bred in West Ryde. He doesn't even come from the northern peninsula - he's the worst type of silvertail.

Manly supporters. There's one in every office, every family, every classroom. Can't find one? Just listen. They're the ones screaming that the referee, the league and the universe are against them. Of course, it's tough living in Balgowlah.

The Manly supporter is easily found around here. He's called Leisure, in honour of Gabrielle Richens. Years ago, former Manly forward Solomon Haumono dated the "Pleasure Machine". The Herald got a sub-editor called

the "Leisure Machine". He certainly took his time verbally orgasming over Steve Menzies.

A mere minute after the silvertails beat the depleted Cowboys on Saturday night, the text messages from Leisure exploded, too: "I hope you're sitting down for this. And your team, commonly known as the pretenders. AKA the dragons they are playing who next weekend? Check and mate."

Five minutes after full-time: "Matt Orford. Glad we did not sign a big-name player like that eh? Check and mate."

Ten minutes after full-time: "How's the shoulders JT? Check and mate."

Six hours after full-time: "Jamie Lyon xvcvvl ddf sdvxc ." He's never made so much sense.

You have to feel for his parents, Shirl and Peter. They're Parramatta supporters. Four of their six children - Margaret, Andrew, Stuart and Leisure - barrack for Manly.

We phoned Shirl and asked if Leisure had been unbearable this week. "Oh no, he's always loved Manly. He came home from the grand finals in 1982 and 1983 in tears after they lost."

Are you ready for him to do the same on Sunday night?"Oh no, why does everyone hate Manly? Peter hates Manly."

Shirl, put Peter on … Peter, who are you going for on Sunday?

"Melbourne."

Because your son loves Manly?"Yeah."

Because you hate Manly?"Yeah. Doesn't everyone?"

Good man.

In the name of ethical journalism, I was going to seek a response from Leisure. In the vein of all Manly supporters, he didn't shut up long enough for me to ask.